I have a special affinity with Jade. Firstly she was my nurse at Surrey Docks Dental surgery before she went on Big Brother, secondly I auditioned that same year for the series.
In the first part of the Channel 4 Jade documentary they showed her original VHS audition tape, among a few others. I watched in fear that mine would be shown. It was a bizarre VHS I sent in but possibly the producers saw, although I was clearly a wounded healer, I wasn’t as troubled as Jade and wouldn’t provide the same entertainment, but who knows? I’m likely to have sunbathed naked back then.
Jade was much younger than me and no way would the producers have wanted two girls coming from Bermondsey (I’m an Essex girl of course but lived and worked in Bermondsey for nearly two decades ). I got off lightly and so did my family. Jade sadly not.
I have been obsessed with all the Big Brother series, as is my fascination with all groups, my step daughter now has me hooked on Love Island, oh dear. The nearest I ever got to be on Big Brother is studying and being in group Psychotherapy for two years, and then facilitating writing as therapy, supervision and counsellors groups. Groups can be fierce, even in therapy.
Coming back to loneliness, firstly Perverse Verse on 26th September is on the ‘loneliness’ issue (invite coming soon) and secondly, my very loved group psychotherapist, having helped so many of us for decades with our internal loneliness, took his life. I’d assumed he’d died of a heart attack or something similar and found out of his suicide at his funeral.
The last time I saw my group therapist was 2017 at the show I did at The Guild of Psychotherapists, he laughed and laughed and we enjoyed a glass of red wine after the show. Watching the Jade documentary made me think of him.
Very very sad.